"It's The Remix To Ignition, Send R. Kelly To Prison"
TW: SEXUAL ASSAULT | Title: @tchungy
I'll be honest, I love the Ignition Remix just as much as the next person ― but I love Black women more. And as much as it pained me to remove R. Kelly from all my 90's playlists, it needed to be done. There is no jam so iconic that it justifies overlooking decades of abuse.
Time and time again Black men have been demonized, hypersexualized, and crucified by the media. Still, we must not let that prevent us from holding them accountable for victimizing Black women. I know what you're thinking: white abusers don't get as much flack as Black ones. You're absolutely right. However, this is not a debate about whether white or Black men have more of a right to abuse Black women. The well being of Black women and femmes must be centered in conversations about sexual assault.
Prioritizing a man's potential rather than a woman's safety is dangerous. It's why more than 20% of Black women have been r*ped (Institute For Women's Policy Research). Black girls are even more vulnerable. Up to 60% of black women say they've been coerced into sex (assault) before age 18 (Black Women’s Blueprint). When Black women like Lupita Nyong'o say they were sexually assaulted, they aren't taken as seriously as white women. Ignoring victims of sexual assault and failing to hold abusers accountable only emboldens monsters like R. Kelly. Worse, it discourages victims from seeking justice.
The quote on quote, "allegations," that have haunted Kelly since 1994 are serious. He uses his power to prey on aspiring musicians. That whole, "separate the artist from the art," argument is a privileged one, and it's garbage. Don't forget that capitalist systems equate commercial success with influence, influence that can be used to hurt people. I mean, Kelly's settlement money had to come from somewhere. We shouldn't have to be directly affected by violence to be angry about it.
Today, victims listened to Kelly boast about being unmuteable. Before this they saw people respond to Spotify's removal of Kelly's music with increased streams. Survivors saw Twitter mourn the death of XXXTentacion by equating the violent attack on his girlfriend to a stage of character development. Survivors watched generations of people cape for Bill Cosby even though he confessed ― and it's not just men.
Honestly, it hurts just a little bit more when women discredit other victims' stories. Remember when Gabby Douglass victim shamed her teammates, only to later admit that she too was assaulted by Larry Nassar? As women, we sometimes fail to support each other because it means coming to terms with our own vulnerability. The same goes for men. When Terry Crews shared his experience, many made fun of him. Herein lies the reason male victims of sexual violence don't seek help. We need to change the way we talk about sexual abuse.
Each time that we as a society support abusers, we tell survivors that they do not matter. It must stop.
Two Decades of Sexual Misconduct
1994: 27-year-old Kelly marries then 15-year-old Aaliyah.
2000: Tiffany Hawkins sues Kelly for engaging in inappropriate sexual conduct with her at age 15.
2001: A video surfaces of Kelly urinating on a 14-year-old girl. Kelly is charged with child pornography and acquitted in 2008.
2001: Tracy Sampson sues Kelly for "allegedly," having sex with her when she was 17.
2002: Patrice Jones sues Kelly for having sex with her at age 16 and coercing her to have an abortion.
2002: Montina Woods sues Kelly for taping her during sex without consent.
2017: BuzzFeed breaks the story of an investigation about Kelly’s alleged sex cult where several young women are being brainwashed and physically, emotionally, and sexually abused.
2017: Kitti Jones exposes the physical and emotional abuse she suffered while in a relationship with Kelly to Rolling Stone.
2018: An anonymous woman files a criminal complaint against Kelly for intentionally giving her an STD, giving alcohol and illegal drugs to a minor, and aggravated assault.